Looks like sum-buddy's got a case of the Mundees ...

Allo my peoples! 

Below is a service I like to provide the co-workers with every now and again. You know, I'm all about some morale boosting with my sassy-behind self.

* * * * * * *

G’morning all –

 

W

elcome to the Monday Morning Malaise, a brand new news service designed to remind and reiterate what a great “joy” it is to find oneself at work on a Monday morning.

 

Today my name is Malady (pronounced me-lady) Mundee and I’m here to bring you facts that you may or may not have known. Some of them, like today’s “Did you know” will immediately feel very obvious to you. If that’s the case, then I’ve done my job.

 

(You should all know that I take great pleasure in stating the obvious as much as possible – case in point, my hammering home what a great pleasure it is to be here on this fine Monday morning.)

 

I’ll also be providing random prescriptions for whatever ails you – drinks, places to buy sledgehammers and such for various killings that you may have in mind. I also encourage you to use our “Reply All” message board – it’s a great place for posting “I’m ‘onna kill so-and-so” sightings.

 

Or you can feel free to mutilate them here, since it’s far easier to clean up: http://www.addictinggames.com/whackyourboss.html

 

 

D

id you know that today is the most depressing day of this year? Well it is, complete with a formula, too! http://health.msn.com/centers/depression/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100153568&GT1=8973

 

 

 

Anyway, here’s your fun Danita morph of the day.

 

What do you get when you cross Willy Wonka with Vanessa from The Cosby Show Season 1?

 

Me! Otherwise known as Wonktastic!

 

 

      +           =   my user pic, which cannot be shown in the context of this post because I am not about paying for a premium account right now. 

 

A Wonktastic Poem

I once had a golden ticket,

But I could not find a place to stick it.

It was a poor attempt to be Wonka,

This hair warped in a misshapen conk-a.

Still, one has to admit it’s funny

Seeing such a head with a case of the “Mundees.

 

That was fun, wasn’t it? Nothing like a few couplets to really brighten up the Office Space!

 

Speaking of Office Space, your song of the day is Michael Bolton’s “Said I Loved You … But I Lied,” because that title made me laugh. 

(That would be the cleverest clause in a divorce settlement ever. Much more charming and honest than “irreconcilable differences.”)

 

Your prescribed drink for the evening?

 

A martini of course! M is for Mondays after all, and what could be better than the vodka of your choice to really make Tuesday morning look bloody terrific? You could also opt for Margaritas, but if you’re like me, I’m saving my tequila for Tuesdays and Thursdays.

 

That’s all for now. Tune in for the next time …

 

Hardly workin’ and workin’ it hard,

danita